I'm really not a bitch. Well, technically I am. (Keira)

I'm still not quite sure what's going on lately but whatever it is, it's pretty cool.  We've moved into this awesome house near the mountains and suddenly mom and dad don't care if I'm on the furniture.  Although I'm hesitant to think it will last since they still seem to be pulling stuff out of bags. My mom is super anal so I would think we would have unpacked everything if we were staying.  But for now, things are great so I'm going with the flow.

Except one thing.  There are dogs - like, everywhere we go.  Mom says I can be a bit of a sorority girl when it comes to other dogs.  I don't know what she's talking about.  I mean, sure it's all fun and games until one of those bitches gives me a dirty look.  Who do they think they are anyway?  I'm blond and beautiful and I won't put up with their crap.  Don't get your pants in a bunch - I've never actually hurt one.  But boy oh boy, can I make a show of it.  My mom tells me I've helped her get over her fear of dog fights because the ones I've had are impressively loud but when I'm done, there's only drool on the other dog,  (Not that I've been in that many fights.  Sheesh, if those girls would just stay away from the things I like, there wouldn't be any trouble.)

Now those big boys we've met.  I could get used to them.  They swarm around me like moths to a flame; who can blame them really, with these eyes?  I pretend I don't care but some of them are just soooo cute.  In fact, the bigger the head, the better, I always say.

The lucky few allowed to be in my presence.

 

 

Me giving Charles Dickens a hard time.  I really made him work for it.

But even with the snotty girls, I'm trying to be nicer.  I even met another bitchy girl off leash on the trail the other day and didn't take her head off.  Must be all those silly classes we took where I was supposed to leave the other dogs alone - no fun!  My mom got all squeaky telling me what a good girl I was - gosh, she can be soooo mortifying.  But the bitchy, small ones - seriously, you're going to start crap with me when I could squash you?  The meanest one we ever met, mom just scooped me up and held me in her arms until the twit's owner came to get her.  Kind of embarassing when she does that (like when your mom keeps pulling on your jeans to see if they fit).  But sometimes I get to win - like on the beach last week when the off-leash dachshund took one look at me and literally turned the other way and left.  Her owner had to walk back and get her.  I hadn't even seen her yet and couldn't get to her anyway (stupid leash) but she knew I was bad ass. 

 

Mom calls this "management". Happens when there are too many other girls around.

I don't see what the big deal is.  I mean, just because I want girl friends who actually understand I'm the prom queen and bow to my every demand doesn't mean I'm unrealistic.  But the boys...oh, the boys can do just about anything and I'll keep teasing them.  Well, within reason that is.  I am still a lady afterall.